Politics don’t matter. Electing Schwarzenegger as governor of California is the best thing the state ever did. Why? Because he gives the best news conferences of any political officer ever.

It doesn’t matter what he says, I hear, “Come with me if you want to live!” Whatever line he delivers to the camera, my ears hear, “Get on da choppah!” Then, at least half of his lines I hear as, “It’s a ferret.”

When your state is in the middle of one of the worst natural disasters of all time, when you’re moving millions of people out of their homes and crowding them into shelters, when you and everyone else realize that there will be thousands of homeless families before it’s all over, the actual words don’t matter so much. What matters is that you have a charismatic, inspirational person who might be able to make you remember just a little gleam of hope. Who hasn’t been felt that from at least one of Arnold’s characters?

Some people might say that a disaster is not the time for jokes. They’re wrong, flat wrong. I’ve been evacuated, I’ve been homeless, I’ve had to dig my way out, and I’ve had to rebuild. If there’s ever a time in anyone’s life for jokes, that’s it. Southern California, I know how you feel, but you’ll be fine, and I hope that you draw what you need from your governor and the rest of the people around you.